Do you believe in signs?

Are they something that we should really think about? What if the signs are trying to tell or lead you to something? Sometimes we just don't pay attention to this kind of thing, but you never know. I know that some of the things in my life that I've never considered as signs are actually signs, good signs. Maybe I'm just being weird, but it's true. I just never think about it after it actually happens, which leads to one of my favorite words, "serendipity." I love that word. The meaning itself is beautiful, ''the gift of making delightful discoveries by pure accident" (sammelpunkt). At least this is one of my favorite definitions of serendipity. It can be like a surprise. A delightful surprise that you've been waiting for, though you never realize it. It's like expecting the unexpected. It's like the whole universe is helping you to make that surprise happens at the end. You just don't know that it would happen but you can feel it sometimes..through signs. So, do I believe in signs? I guess the answer to it is..yes.

"Kupercaya alam pun berbahasa
Ada makna dibalik semua pertanda
Firasat ini
Rasa rindukah ataukah tanda bahaya"

(Marcell - Firasat)

whom to trust?

Seseorang bertanya kepadaku, siapa sih yang bisa kamu bilang teman atau sahabat? aku hanya bisa menggelengkan kepala karena aku sendiri tidak yakin akan jawabannya. Sahabatku banyak...sepertinya. Mereka semua tersebar di bumi ini, ada yang di belahan bumi bagian timur dan ada yang di belahan bumi bagian barat. Lalu dia bertanya lagi. Sebatas apa sih kamu melihat seseorang sebagai sahabat? Menurutku sahabat itu adalah seseorang yang selalu ada dikala susah dan senang. Seseorang yang mau mendengarkan curahan hatiku dan mau memberikan solusi kepada problemaku. Seseorang yang bisa membuka diriku disaat dia merasakan kegelisahanku. Seseorang yang mau berteman dengan diriku yang apa adanya dengan tulus hati. Kamu bilang sahabatmu banyak, bagaimana bisa kamu menemukan orang2 yang seperti kamu bilang? Mungkin aku adalah salah satu dari sebagian orang yang beruntung di dunia ini. Kalau teman? Kuterdiam. Kalau teman? Kuakui aku punya banyak teman, baik yang dekat maupun yang biasa saja. Tapi terkadang aku tak tau apakah mereka benar2 ingin berteman denganku. Mengapa? Lalu kubalik bertanya. Apakah bisa kuanggap orang2 itu teman apabila mereka hanya mau berteman denganku disaat mereka suka? Maksudmu? Aku bingung. Taukah kamu bahwa di dunia ini apabila kamu berteman dengan orang yang tidak disukai oleh teman2mu, kamu akan dijauhi. Apakah aku harus menjauhi teman atau sahabatku yang mereka tidak sukai agar mereka mau menyukaiku? Disaat teman atau sahabatku jauh, orang2 itu mendekatiku, tetapi disaat dia dekat, aku tak digubris sedikitpun. Orang2 seperti itu yang kuanggap sebagai teman2 baikku ternyata memiliki perasaan yang berbeda. Ah, ya sudahlah. Toh aku tetap sayang mereka. Mungkinkah aku terlalu naif? Aku juga tidak mengerti.

:)

"There’s always that one person that will always have your heart
You never see it coming cause you’re blinded from the start
Know that you’re that one for me
it’s clear for everyone to see
Ooh baby (you will always be my boo)"

ini salah..itu salah..jadi harus gimana? if you were me, you would know how I feel. cape..

To sing or not to sing

lol. This whole Ashlee Simpson thing makes me wanna laugh. What happened to her? Okay, here is the story. She performed at the Saturday Night Live show last week and when she was going to start her second song, she was caught lipsyncing!! Her recorded voice from her first song came out live and her band continued playing that song, which wasn't supposed to be played. She started doing the silly dance and finally went off the stage. Remember Milli Vanilli? lol. It was so funny and totally embarrasing. I didn't watch the show on that day, but it's all over the Internet.

At the end of the show she apologized and blamed her band for playing the wrong song. Not cool. What's up with that? All her fans were so mad that her Web site forum had to be closed. One of her staff was so fed up because of all the angry fans and posted her phone number on her Web site. The Webmaster finally found out about that and had to take it out. lol. Too late. Guess what? People are now selling her phone number on eBay.

She finally apologized for blaming her band and she said that she had a voice problem and that was her first time doing the lipsync. lol. They said that her drummer pushed the wrong button. Well..that's live TV!

Check out this Web site to see her SNL performance and other things:

http://www.ashleesimpson.net/

Why am I writing about Ashlee Simpson anyway?

Happy Birthday...

Lyrics of the day: Nelly - Over and over

"Now that I’ve realized
That I’m going down
From all this pain you put me through
Every time I close my eyes I lock it down
I can’t go on not loving you"

Switchfoot

Gosh, my mind's everywhere. I couldn't believe that I didn't write anything about my weekend, because me and Puma got a chance to go to Denver to watch Switchfoot live! I love that band. It was at the Paramount Theatre. It was fun, except there were so many high schoolers with their parents! Oh well! There were two opening bands, one of them was called The Format or something. They were awesome. Switchfoot was awesome too. Of course, they put their two biggest hits at the end. They played "Meant to live" and then went backstage as if it was over. I hate when artists do that in every concert. Come on, we know that they will come out and sing again!! That's just so lame. Anyway, at the end they played "Dare you to move." I love that song. I fell in love with this band since their songs became the soundtracks for A Walk to Remember .

The concert finished at about 10. We already had dinner earlier because it was the first day of fasting and we were so hungry. We decided to spend the night at Mba Rani's. Woke up at around 3:30 a.m. and went to Jerusalem to get something to eat..yumm! The next day we just hang around in Denver, went shopping, ate Chinese for dinner, and went home. I was so tired, but I had fun that day :)

State of Confusion

I watched Runaway Bride last night for the gazzilion time and came across a quote from Maggie Carpenter, which made my tears fell from my eyes..hiks..hiks..lol =P

It goes like this:

"Look, I guarantee that we'll have tough times. And I guarantee that at some point, one or both of us will want to get out of this thing. But I also guarantee that if I don't ask you to be mine I'll regret it for the rest of my life. Because I know in my heart, you're the only one for me."

I'm in this state of confusion. Dilemma. It's like I have to choose between two different paths. The first path will definitely make me happy, but it's only temporary. The second one is still unclear. I'm not sure if it's going to make me happy or miserable. But I'm pretty sure that it's the right choice. Hmm..what the hell am I talking about?

Marhaban Ya Ramadhan

Selamat menunaikan ibadah puasa 1425 H bagi yang melaksanakan.

Mohon maaf lahir dan bathin.

Semoga puasanya lancar2 semuanya. Amien

-Dhania-

Good Quote

"In this life I'm not looking for someone that I can live with, but I'm looking for someone that I can't live without."

That's a really touching quote. If i were going to play devil's advocate here, what if..you find someone that you can't live without, and that someone feels the same way, but you just can't be together? What would you do?

My life colors

I took this test from a book called, "Life Colors," by Pamala Oslie. The two colors that turn out really strong in my aura are sensitive tan and blue. It's funny because I've always love blue since I was little. Everything that my parents got me from glue to my clothes are bluish in color, because they know that blue's my favorite color. But, sensitive tan? I don't understand it at first. I don't even know what sensitive tan looks like. But when I actually read the book, it does make sense. Sensitive tan is the mental life color and blue is the emotional color. Both are said to be related, but in the opposite ways, because "Sensitive tans are the bridge between the mental colors and the emotional colors. Their personalities are a subtle combination of the mental Tan qualities and the emotional Blue qualities."

Facts about Sensitive Tans:

• Sensitive tans are emotional and intuitive, but they tend to keep their feelings to themselves. True. One time when I was still in college back home, I was so upset and told my feelings to my friend and I actually cried in front of him. One time only! And he still makes fun about it :P
• Sensitive tans are sincere and patient listeners.
• Sensitive tans value love, commitment, dedication, patient understanding, and good communication in their relationships and they want the same consideration from their mates. True. I guess that's why sometimes I ask too much.
• Prefer practical, reliable, and devoted mates who will commit to a long-term relationship.
• One of the most appealing occupations that fit me is public relations. Hmm..no wonder I've always enjoyed organizing events.

Facts about Blues:

• The most loving, nurturing, and supportive personalities of the Life Colors.
• The most emotional personalities. They can cry at the drop of a hat - when they are happy, hurt, angry, sad, or for no apparent reason. True. I cry when I listen to sad and mellow song lyrics.
• When blues are in power, people trust them.
• More than anything in the world, Blues want to be in loving, committed, and emotionally connected relationship.
• Happy when they are in a good relationship, but most unfulfilled and depressed when they are alone or are in bad relationships. Hmm..whatever.
• Blues can give themselves away or change themselves just to be loved. Not good, but true.
• Blues have a difficult time letting go, because to let go means to stop loving. Absolutely true!
• Occupation that is most appealing is assistant or director at nonprofit organizations or psychologist. I worked at a nonprofit organization before and I always thought that I could be a good psychologist :P

I guess my Blue side is stronger than my Sensitive Tan's lately. My life is a bit complicated right now, and I really need to start sorting things out.

I've learned a lot about me from this book. I thought I knew myself well before I read this book. Well..I guess I was wrong.

My stories

Sometimes I look back over my life and think about everything that's happened, which always makes me smile :) Let me share you some stories:

1. I was deeply in love with my bestfriends' boyfriends. Okay, there were two of them, and the boyfriends were my bestfriends too. It was a long time ago and nothing really happened, though, 'coz I knew that I would be in trouble!
2. As I think about it, I've always had this thing for my bestfriends (i mean the guys!). Don't get me wrong! I'm not that kind of girl who likes to steal my bestfriends' boyfriends!! I've always kept my mouth shut about it.
3. I found out that my boyfriend from high school had an affair with my junior and I ended up yelling at her almost everyday in high school.
4. There was this guy from junior high that I really liked. We met again a couple of years later through one of my friends from college and we kinda hit it off. We kissed and I felt no sparks. I said to myself, "forget it!" And I've regretted it, ever since. Sparks or no sparks, they're not important. Are they?
5. This one was embarrasing, but I met this guy on the Net and we become such good friends. I guess his girlfriend snooped to his computer and found my pictures and she actually yelled at me in a chat room!! After almost 5 years, me and the guy are still good friends, but we've never met, even once! It's just funny because we're in this circle of friends that we both know....but we've never met.
6. I was chatting with a guy on MSN, when suddenly her ex-girlfriend signed-in by using his screen name and started asking me questions about my relationship with her ex-boyfriend, wtf?
7. I had never been in love until I met my last boyfriend. I can't stand him, but I love him to death. Sometimes I still wish that we can go back together.

Okay, enough said, before I start humiliating myself here. Would you like to tell me your stories now?

So much to do, so little time

Aaarrgghhh!! I just need to scream for a second. I have so many things going on right now. Then you'll be thinking, "Why are you blogging right now?" Hmm..I don't know..just need some time to relax, I guess. Here is my "to do" list for this week:

1. Finish my newsletter assignment (I'm in page 3 now! One more to go).
2. Finish the diversity trek calendar for work and print it.
3. Take home exam for one of my communication classes.
4. Do my broadcast writing assignment.
5. Do a summary for a small presentation.
6. Came up with questions about pda vs regular agenda.
7. Finish questions from my ethics class on "The Insider."
8. Finish a bulletin board for work. Topic: World Unity Fair, and cultural Organizations.
9. Finish the CREATE newsletter.
10. Finish more broadcast assignment.
11. Help out Oktoberfest on Friday.
12. Help out Martial Arts on Friday. (I'm not doing THE martial arts, if you're curious about that)
13. Do my readings.

I'm getting sick just by reading the list. Oh well, I guess I better hurry up. I only have 3 days left...!!

Red Rocks

I just had the best weekend ever! Well, probably not the best, but still the greatest :) We went to see Norah Jones concert on Friday night at one of the most beautiful venues ever, Red Rocks Amphitheatre. It was just amazing. The place was amazing, the scenery was gorgeous. You can see the city of Denver, the lights, from the top. The concert started with an opening artist, Amos Lee. I had to buy his cd after the show because he's so good. His music is kinda similar to Norah Jones. And at about 9 p.m. Norah Jones started to sing. She sang all my favorite songs, so I was happy. Although this concert was to promote her new album, she sang a lot of songs from her previous one. After the concert, we went to Denver and had dinner. We planned to spend the night at mba rani's place, so we went there after dinner. We went out to "Church" (the crowd was really bad) and 2 a.m. after hours clubs and went home at around 4:30. I was so tired, but I had so much fun.

The next day (Saturday), we woke up at about noon! We had lunch and went out to do some shopping. We had dinner at the Cheesecake Factory, but I ended up not having a cheese cake at all, because I was too full. Dinner was perfect! We had shrimp scampi pasta, fried calamari, and dumplings. We went home to Fort Collins around 8:30 p.m. and arrived at around 10 p.m.

I had a really fun weekend! My highlight, of course, Norah Jones concert at Red Rocks. Here is a picture of redrock theatre that I took from their Web site, Red Rocks Online:




For more bigger pictures, click Here.

Red Rocks has definitely become one of my favorite places in Colorado.

daily routine

Almost every day around 6 p.m. I pass this field in front of the health center at CSU. There are always people playing lacrosse, shouting and cheering gibberish words that I can't even understand.

Almost every night around 9 p.m. I pass another field in front of the rec center at CSU. There are always people playing softball and soccer.

I think they are some kind of signs, telling me to exercise more, lol.

By the way, something good (I think) from my past has come back, and I feel kinda happy :)

It's the Last Day of Summer...

...and it has been cold and raining all day. Hiks...Summer went really fast. I skipped my copy-editing class today and ended up working its homework. We have to create a design for either a four page newsletter or a front-page of a newspaper. I haven't finished it yet, but at least I'm in the second page now. Anyway, Aliya told me to put our New York weekend getaway story in my blog, so I guess I'm just gonna write about that.

Day 1:

I arrived in JFK and Kamala picked me up. We went to her apartment in Manhattan with that goddamn taxi, which was so expensive. Fourty five freekin' dollars. Oh well. After that, we met up with Dimas, who drove from Philly, and we went to meet Aliya and Rayner. We had so much fun!! We went out to eat, of course, yakitori..and then we met up with Denny. Gosh, it's been a long time, since we last met.

We went to a jazz lounge (i forgot what its name), and then we went to Dallas bbq to eat again! Gosh..it's all about eating that night. We met up with Debon and Ali and..oh..I met Yulie, my friend from elementary school, whom I hadn't seen since ages. We went home at around 2 a.m. and crashed in bed. It was a long night.

Day 2:

Me and Kamala went out for lunch to get some korean food. After walking through lots..i mean LOTS of korean restaurants, we finally chose one with a funny name! I forgot what it was. After a while, Rayner and Aliya came and then we went shopping from there. Woohoo! We went to a lot of cool shops in Soho. From there we ate dinner at nyonya and then we went home. At night, we promised Denny that we're going to his farewell party..and we did. But first we made a stop in Times Square and went clubbing for a couple hours at Avalon. This place used to be a church and they renovated it. It was a really cool place. I had fun and I was sober! We decided to go to Denny's party at around 2 a.m. at Nova. I met Ka' Shinta and a lot of Denny's friends. Somebody had a "little" jagerblaster accident..hehehe...thank God, we got a ride from Dimas. Thanks, Dimskibuw!! We had fun talking to "her" that night, didn't we Dim? Hihihihihi.

Day 3:

Aliya and Rayner left NY that day. Me and Kamala went out to eat the "lunch" Gyros..hehe..they said the "night" Gyros was better. Oh Well...it's good though. Then, we saw the Republican National Convention protest on the street. There's a lot of people that day. It was crazy. I got some pictures in my cell, but they weren't very clear. For dinner, we went to Bubba Gump. It was a fun restaurant, because it had Forest Gump theme, so everything was about the movie. We went home and watch the MTV VMA on TV and I kinda helped Kamala pumped her air bed!! Gosh..that was tough, because she didn't bought the electric pump, so we need to pump it by hand!! It took us an hour!! Anyway, we went to bed at about 1 a.m.

Day 4:

I got up at around 3:00 a.m. and we left from Kamala's apartment at around 4:30 a.m. We had a little problem with the Subway because it didn't show up when it was supposed to. I started to panick but I tried to look calm hehehhehee...just kidding. I got there on time though. And..that's pretty much it. Check out some pictures on my "pictures" page.

And now..I'm looking forward to:

September 24: Norah Jones Concert at Red Rock
November 20: Another New York Trip!!!

Yay!!

aku masih mencari

selesai sudah...
ku baru saja menutup buku yang terindah yang pernah kubaca
berlembar-lembar cerita telah kulewati
cerita indah yang penuh dengan cinta...tangisan...amarah dan segala macam lika-liku kehidupan
sering kali ku termenung..mengingat cerita-cerita yang kubaca

terkadang kutersenyum..terkadang kumenangis dibuatnya
terkadang kuingin tuk kembali membacanya dari halaman pertama
tetapi terkadang kuingin tuk menutup selamanya karena ku tak mampu tuk membacanya kembali
ku tak mampu untuk mengingat kembali segala memori
ku tak mampu untuk menangis
ku tak mampu untuk menahan rasa sakit

kini ku hanya bisa memandang buku itu
terpajang di rak kamarku

ku pergi tuk mencari buku baru yang bisa kumulai
kulihat satu persatu
kadang kubermimpi tentang cerita indah..tanpa cacat
kuingin membaca buku seperti itu
lagi..kulihat satu persatu
tak ada yang yang seperti itu

kembali kupandang bukuku yang lama
terpajang di rak kamarku
kuingin yang seperti itu lagi
kuingin membacanya lagi
aku berjanji takkan bosan

kadang kumerasa buku itu berkata kepadaku
"carilah buku yang lain..mulailah lembaran yang baru.."
kadang ku tak mau mendengarnya
kadang ku tak percaya mengapa kuharus memulai lembaran yang baru

aku lelah
haruskah ku mencari
haruskah ku mulai lagi
tak bisakah buku itu datang kepadaku?

buku yang bisa membuatku bahagia
buku yang akan menemaniku setiap hari
buku yang tak akan pernah selesai kubaca

aku masih mencarinya...

p.s: i miss u

written by: anonymous

Ready to Lose You - Ten2Five

Baby listen to me
I want you to tell me the truth
Stop being an actor
Don't put my love into your game

Can't you see I love you more than you know
Can't you see I'm trying to be honest

Don't deny me, I know it won't last forever
Don't argue me, your reason is not enough to make me
Believe in everything you did

'Cause I'm ready to lose you
And I'm ready to let you go
So I'm ready to live without you
Please don't try to hold me
'Cause I'm ready to lose you
I'm ready to lose you

Addicted to Reality Shows..?

Where have I been? I've been around..working as usual. We had RAM Welcome, a two-week programs for new and returning students at CSU. The programs include carnival and other interesting events. The carnival was on Thursday. It was supposed to be an outdoor event, but because of the weather, they moved it inside the Moby arena. Moby arena is a place where we have athletic events, such as volleyball and basketball. During the carnival, I had to watch the ring toss booth. It was a hard one and not many people came to try, because they knew it would be hard.

I was also supposed to work on Saturday night for a dance program, but it was cancelled. So, I ended up going to a presentation from STA travel. For those of you who like to watch Road Rules extreme on MTV, that Jodi girl came to CSU to represent the STA travel. She talked about her travel experience and her life on the road with the other road rulers. It was interesting to hear her experience and it was also interesting to hear the questions that came up from the people who came to the presentation. At the beginning, people were kinda just asking questions about the places she had traveled, bla..bla..bla, and then there was one guy who started to ask questions about how to apply to be in the Real World/Road Rules show. And then, people were starting to ask questions about all the drama that's happening in the Road Rules extreme show, including me :P

I'm not a really big fan of reality TV shows, but when it comes to MTV reality shows..you can call me an addict. I watch everything on MTV, from the newlyweds, Ashley Simpson show, to real world and road rules. I even watch the Assistant!! For those who don't know about the Assistant, it is a show where Andy Dick is trying to hire a new assistant for him. It's a really irritating show, especially when you're watching Andy Dick throws up (okay, that's disgusting), but I keep watching it anyway. Anyway, back to Jodi. There was this girl who asked about what happened between her and Patrick, another road ruler. And she was like, "well, there was a kiss, but they didn't really show it on TV..bla..bla..bla.." Then, what happened to Patrick and Jillian? I was just curious about that, so that question came up from me. And she was like, "well, we all kinda talk about it, and now they never speak to each other again." Now, I'm thinking, I don't think that's an appropriate question :P If I hook up with a guy, and that guy hook up with somebody else, I don't think I want to know what happen to that guy :P Maybe it's just me..hihihi.

Anyways, today is the first day of the Fall semester. It went really well. I worked a little bit today to finish my "recycling" display case. Then, I went to the mall and bought some earrings. And then, I went to Starbucks for a cup of caramel macchiatto and bought some chocolates for my mom. I only had one class today, communication to technology transfer. It seems like a fun class. We talked about new technologies and how the technologies play an important part in communication.

In four days, I'll be in New York. Yay! I can't wait to get out from this town, to leave my Fort Collins' weekend rituals, to leave behind all the complicated situations that still remain unsolved. I'm getting blurred. At the end, I just wanna have fun. Period.

Busy..Busy..Busy

I'm at the library. Blogging. I was supposed to finish my research proposal, but I guess it wouldn't happen. It's almost done, but I still have some parts that are missing. So, here I am, sitting at the library..listening to my mp3s.

Anyway, I've been really busy this week and will be busy again next week. Why? We have trainings almost everyday for residence life at csu with all the RAs (Residence Assistant) and staff. Not only with trainings, but I also have million things to do at work. I have to finish our bulletin board, display cases, packets for our upcoming International Women's Orientation, newsletter, plus my research proposal :o Lucky me, today we don't have any trainings.

One part of the trainings that I liked was the GLBT (Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, and Transgender) presentation. It really gave me a new perspective and understanding about the GLBT community. We also learned a lot of GLBT definitions. I'm glad that I went to that presentation.

Last night we had a dance at Corbett Hall. Me and some other staff had to come early to decorate the room. The theme of the dance is the timeline of different generation. We have decoration for the Ice Age, Ancient Egypt, the 50s, 60s, and 70s, and the Future. The central program staff had to dress like the people from the ancient greek, while others dressed as people from the great depression era, 80s (I saw two girls dressed like cindy lauper!), last day on earth, present, future, wild-wild west, and the 70s (they dressed like in the movie, Grease. It was wild. I wore a Balinese sarong that I wrapped around my body. It's more like a hawaiian theme than the ancient greek. It was fun.

Hmm..it's already three o'clock and the library will close in two hours. I should probably try to finish my proposal now.

Married at age 23

lol. That used to be my dream since I was in high school. I want to get married at a young age. The reason? I think it will be fun to grow older with your children. My mom got married when she was 23. My two bestfriends who are at the same age as me are married and one has a baby on the way. Those are probably the other reasons. How young is to young to get married anyway?

I just turned 23 two weeks ago and still enjoying my single life :) Do I want to get married this year? Hmm..Nah..I don't think so. I only have 11 months left untill I turn 24 next year. Let's just wait and see.

There's the dream of someone else...

Quotes from You've Got Mail:

Frank: What about you, is there someone else?
Kathleen Kelly: No. No, but, but there's the dream of someone else.

You've Got Mail is one of my favorite movies of all time. I've watched it more than 20 times or more. I really like to watch the chemistry between Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks. They look so cute together. The reason why I put the quote above is because I feel like I'm in the same situation with Kathleen. My friends have been asking me the same question over and over again, and my answer is still the same. NO. But the quote above is my real answer. I've been having this dream for years, even when I was still with my ex. Isn't that funny? What if..this dream keeps haunting when I end up with someone else? What if..this dream is supposed to come true? Although, I don't even know how to make it happens.

The question that keeps coming up is, "should I wait..or should I not?"

Random Stuff

I can't believe that Summer is almost over. I have only 18 days left before school starts and I haven't done anything exciting this Summer. That sounds really sad isn't it..hihihi. Anyway, I really need to get out from this town. That's why, I'm planning to go to New York to meet up with my three best friends in a couple of weeks!! Yay..that's exciting. I haven't seen them in a while. Although it's only gonna be a weekend get away, I'm still really excited!!!

Today, I had a picnic with some friends from work. Actually, It was supposed to be a meeting, but we decided to do it differently. We went to City Park at noon and had lunch there. Each of us brought some dishes or drinks. It was like a little pot-luck party. The meeting only took about 10 minutes, then we decided to play Bocce Ball, one of my favorite sports hihihihi. It is really easy and I'm not sure that it can be considered as a sport, because I'm really bad at sports hehehe.

I got home at around 2 and spent my afternoon watching dvd and taking a nap :P I've been watching some movies these couple of days.



I watched: stuck on you, monster, butterfly effect, 50 first date, along came polly, and the human stain. I didn't get to see them when they're playing at the theatre, so I just rented them. Butterfly effect? That's the movie with Ashton Kutcher in it. I, honestly, didn't really get the connection between the Chaos theory and the butterfly effect. Well, maybe it's just me. This movie is.."interesting"..it's just like one of those Twilight Zone movies, but I prefer to watch twilight zone instead of this movie. So, don't waste your money to watch it hehehe. The other movies were alright, except for The Human Stain, I slept during the movie and watched it over when I woke up :P It's a little bit boring.

I've been really enjoying my days lately. Although I have to work almost everyday, I still have some time to relax and have some fun. Sometimes just to sit at home, watch tv, and do nothing can be relaxing. Don't you think?

What's With the Weather??

The weather sucks. It's cold and cloudy in July. Today is around 57 F and I think it's gonna rain again tonight. Oh well!! I just got home from work. I was sent home early because they have too many people. I asked my manager if I could go home and he said the big YES. Yay! But..I have nothing to do now. Maybe I'll just take a nap later :P

Anyways, yesterday me and my friends went to see Bourne Supremacy. (Did you see Bourne Identity? Well, this is the sequel). We went there around 6 p.m. to catch the 7:15 show. We knew that there's gonna be a long line, because it's the first day it came out. When we got there..it was sold out!! Even the 7:45 show. Gosh, I thought we were early. We should had used Fandango. Then, we decided to go to another theatre, because we really wanted to see the movie. And..yay..We got the tickets. After the movie, we went to chili's for dinner. I ordered a cup of my favorite soup there, enchiladas soup, and buffalo wings with bleu cheese. Hmm..Yummy!!

It was a great night and an A+ movie. Matt Damon is so gorgeous in his black long coat. I think I like this movie better than the first one, although I don't really remember the first one..hihihi. Can't wait to see the third one! I heard that there's gonna be the sequel to I, Robot too. Hmm..that will be interesting to see.

It's saturday afternoon..I'm not sure what to do tonight. All my friends are still at work. Tomorrow I have to get up really early again to work for 12 hours from 6:50 a.m. Isn't that great??

How's your weekend so far?

It's Raining..Again!!

I just got back from work and it's raining..again. It's been like this since this afternoon. I got a split shift at work today, so I got a chance to take a nap..hihihi. Anyways, my week has been going well. I pretty much work during the day and just hang out or eat out with friends. Here in Fort Collins, we have a lot of restaurants, but there aren't that many variety of food. Maybe I'm just bored with all the food. But one restaurant that keeps going up in my favorite list is Jeju. It's a Japanese-Korean restaurant, located in downtown of Fort Collins. They have a really good food there, from sushi to tempura to Korean barbecue. Hmm...Yummy. The atmosphere is also really nice. It's more like a loungelike with a nice light setting, where you can here Jazz and blues music. It's not like an Asian restaurant at all. Here in Fort Collins, we also have a lot of local owner coffee shops. I've only been to one of them, and it was..alright. Still, Starbucks is way much better. Many people here, well..maybe in the other states too, they're not really a fan of Starbucks and its monopoly power. What's with that anyway? So what, they have a good coffee, and they're making a lot of money from it. I found this Web Site about Why do I hate Starbucks? This guy..or gal came up with numbers of reason why he or she hates Starbucks:

• The majority of the coffee is grown using underpaid third world labor.
• Starbucks is spreading the world like a virus, infecting cultures with their formula of what a coffee shop should be.
• They are everywhere.
• They have predatory business practices. Doing things like paying landlords to not renew leases for coffee shops so that they can move in.
• They sell fake corporate responsibility.
• I think that their coffee sucks. It is always bitter.
• The gross profit margin per store is, on average, 59.1%, this is money that could easily be lost if they paid more than a dollar a pound for coffee. (read: livable wage for their slave labor)
• Faux ecologic responsibility.

What do you think? Maybe some of them make sense, but I still love drinking their coffee anyway. And...they say that you will feel the Starbucks experience when you drink their coffee. I agree..whatever that means!

 Anyway, me and my friends had been wanting to see I, Robot. So, yesterday, after I got home from working long hours, the four of us went to see I, Robot. It was awesome, I like it a lot. It will be scarry though, if that's how 2035 is gonna be like..hehe, but maybe it will be really cool to have a robot at home.

There are lots of good movies at the theatre that I haven't seen. And more good movies are "coming soon" hihihi..Bourne Supremacy and Collateral are on the top of my list. The village? I don't know, I get scared easily by watching that kind of movie. I also haven't seen Fahrenheit 9/11, The Terminal, and The Notebook. Isn't that sad..hiks.

By the way, I got a call from Neeru this afternoon. He's been having fun for the past two months in Jakarta now!! I'm so jealous. But I will see my parents too in about two weeks though. Yup..they're coming here. Well, I'm planning to meet them in Las Vegas. I made a lot of plans, and I just found out yesterday that I have to be in a two weeks full of training when they're here. It's kinda sad, but I'll see what I can do with the schedule.
Well, that's all for now. Have a great night you guys!

A Little Update

Just a little update from me. Nothing much going on lately. Still, I've been busy with work and stuff. Weekend doesn't feel like weekend anymore. I kind of miss the old times when I was still in Jakarta. Weekend seemed really fun. On Friday night I usually go out with friends..kadang2 mencoba tempat2 baru..hehe. I remember when I was in high school, if we didn't have school on Saturday, we always went to new york cafe to watch the Groove on stage..hehe..they always knew our crowd, because we're all girls..hehe. On Saturday night we usually "nonton midnite." And on Sunday, I usually go out for lunch or just to "socially drink" coffee at the mall with my parents..hehe. Gosh, I miss home so much.

Last weekend (Fri-Sat) I had to go for a one night retreat. It was alright. I had fun, until I discovered that my room was full of bugs!! We finally moved to another room (which was nicer than the first one hehe), because we decided to not sleep with bugs flying around the room. What we did on the retreat was pretty much team building and playing games. The highlight of the retreat was when we got to do the drumming for diversity training. It was awesome..we could choose any kinds of instruments from drum to tambourine, and we just started playing them for more than two hours. We could all feel the energy that came out from the instruments. It was fun! The next day we all just felt exhausted and ready to go home. We stopped at dairy queen for ice cream on the way home..yumm!!

Hmm..what else..I got home two hours ago from eating out with puma and went to Walmart to buy some stuff. I didn't really wanna go at first because it's "Nip/Tuck Show" day..hehe..but I went anyway and got home on time to watch the second show.

Hmm..I guess that's pretty much it. Tomorrow is another new day at work. How's your day people?

Happy 4th of July!!

Yay!! We're going to see fireworks at City Park, tonight. I hope it's not gonna rain again tonight, because it's kinda cloudy right now. But it's alright, it will be fun..fun..fun!! Finally, today's my first day off after working like crazy for the past two weeks. This morning I got a chance to have a cup of Starbucks' breakfast blend coffee with two slices of bread with chocolate sprinkles. Yumm!! And finally, I got a chance to go to sleep last night without having to set my alarm. I spent my morning by just sitting around in front of my computer, browsing, waiting for my bid at ebay to end, and chatting with Mur who's still having fun in Jakarta!! I "envy" you!! I also talked to A-lie, one of my bestfriends since forever, on the phone today. It felt good to talk to her again. Actually, we laughed more than we talked!! I think the only people who can understand our jokes are us. We often lost touch, but we're still very good friends!! We talked about lots of things and came up with why people always ask sensitive questions to others such as virginity and sex. Those are like "pertanyaan-pertanyaan yang kurang penting untuk dibahas ke orang lain." Those are like something that..I think we should just keep to ourselves. Like in Friendster for example, lots of those bulletin boards questions are about these subjects. And of course, no one will really be honest about their answers. It's just dumb!

Anyway, I'm thinking of moving to DC, which is where she lives right now, after I graduate, to apply for that broadcasting job that we're talking about. It sounds like a fun job, and it will be a great experience for me if I want to get a similar job back home. We'll see. I still have a year to go anyway.

My weekend? So far so good. Me and some friends went to see Spiderman 2 on Friday. It was good!! I like it better than the first one. Yesterday, I had to wake up early at 6 A.M. to work (yes..I work on weekends) and spent my afternoon with friends. We went to Whole Foods Market, a new organic store in town. It was really crowded inside the store and everything was so expensive!! After that, we had some Japanese food in downtown for dinner. As usual, me and Puma ended up at my place, watching the Food network channel. It was an okay night. How's your weekend?

nip/tuck

Did you guys see that nip/tuck show on FX earlier? I thought it was so disturbing, but I kept watching it anyway..hehe. Plus Julian McMahon (Dr. Christian Troy) is so gorgeous!! I think this show is different from the other plastic surgery shows such as the one from MTV or the Swan, because they add more "drama" in the story, which makes it more interesting. Can't wait to see more of it next week.

Today I had a training for my second job, and it started at 9am until 4pm. It was so tiring! We had to walk around campus and went to advocacy offices to get information and learn about their programs. We also had to do a lot of activities like scavenger hunt and a bunch of games. And "luckily", it was pretty nice outside. It was really..really hot and sunny. Oh well, let's just hope it stays.

Tired..tired..tired..tomorrow I have to get up early again to work and do a lot of other things..sigh. Nite, all!

Second Day of Summer

Welcome to Colorado..It is the second day of Summer, but it doesn't feel like summer at all!! The weather has been really gloomy for the past couple of weeks. It's always raining and the sun only comes out once in a while. Today in Fort Collins is 55F and it will drop tonight to 45F. The weather here is very "unusual", because sometimes the weather can be really nice and sunny, but it can change very dramatically at night. Or it can be snowing the next day. I remember last year we had a very big storm after Spring break, so we actually got a two-week break from school!! That was nice, but I didn't like "the walking in the snow" part. It's slippery and wet. No thanks!

Anyways, I just got home from work and feel like writing something on my blog. I've been working for 8-12 hours a day for almost everyday. I've been really busy. But, hey..I kinda need the money anyway, so that's alright. I have two jobs this summer, one in the dining service and one in the housing service on campus. I work in a dining hall for the students who live in a dorm. Basically what I do is just serving food or swiping their meal cards. It's not really bad. My second job is pretty easy and fun. I work for this organization called CREATE . My job is to create bulletin boards, posters, and display cases with different themes every month. They will be put inside the campus' dorms and apartments. We also organize and create events, which I always enjoy doing. I guess thanks to "redlight".

I didn't take any classes this summer, so I can work a lot. But still..I have to finish my research proposal for my thesis. It's almost done, but I'm still too lazy to finish it. I decided to do a research on "The Ethical Issues of Downloading Music via the Internet." Do I download music? Yes..hehe, why do we have to buy music CDs if they are available on the Net? I guess I shouldn't be saying that.

By the way, yesterday was father's day, so "Happy Father's Day" to all dads!! I don't know why we don't have father's day in Indonesia. We have hari ibu on December 22 and hari anak-anak on July 1, but we never celebrate hari bapak. Why is that? Don't you think that your dad needs appreciation too? That is so weird. I want to get my dad something. I already know what he probably wants, but don't know when I can give it to him, because I don't really want to send the gift by mail. First, it's too expensive. Second, I don't want to lose it in the mail.

Anyway, I found this really sweet quote on the Net:

a father is someone that
holds your hand at the fair
makes sure you do what your mother says
holds back your hair when you are sick
brushes that hair when it is tangled because mother is too busy
lets you eat ice cream for breakfeast
but only when mother is away
he walks you down the aisle
and tells you everythings gonna be ok

-Unknown

Enjoy your night, everyone!!

Life is not so ordinary

I got an early phone call from a good friend and we talked about relationships and stuff, and how things could changed in just seconds, which made me wonder about life..my life. Sometimes, life can be so perfect, when everything seems to be just right and you feel like you can't ask for more because you already have what you want. We are blinded by happiness without thinking about what's gonna happen next. When we fail or when something bad happens, we start blaming ourselves for no reasons. We feel like we're stucked in one position and we can't move on. Or maybe it's us who don't want to move on? That's probably because we're not ready. And I don't think we'll ever be ready for everything.

Sometimes you just have to accept for what you get in life, either it's good or bad. We should just enjoy the good and learn from the bad. Should people be afraid to hope or to reach for something? I don't know, I feel like I don't really want to give too much hope anymore. We live in this world to gamble and from what I've been through, I think there's no need to be afraid. But before we make efforts, we should probably be prepared about what the result's gonna be like. Again, it's easier said than done. But, hey..it's worth a try.

It all happened for a reason

Can lovers stay friends after going through a painful break up? I don't know the answer to that. Some people say yes, but some people say no. Well..it's easier said than done.

When two people with different characters are in a relationship, they are trying to learn about each other to make their relationship works. They become bestfriends and even like a family. You feel comfortable when you're together and feel like you're missing your other half when he's not around. You don't have to worry about what he thinks about what you're gonna wear or even your most embarrasing behaviors, because you know that you are loved very much. Just to hear his voice from the other end of a phone call is like a pain reliever after a long day at work. Just to receive a short text message on your cellphone from him has made your day. Just to see your instant messenger blinking with his name on it can make you happy, because you know that he's thinking about you.

However, shits happen here and there. You can never predict them. The thought of loosing my very bestfriend and soulmate..has never occurred to me since the past three years. You can lie to everybody about your feelings and pretend like nothing happen, but deep inside you know, you're hurting.

My friend once said that people need to be strong in this situation because the pain is not over yet. It will keep coming back and haunt you on every little step that you make, every minute, every day. Again, it's easier said than done. But I guess he has a point there. There's nothing much to do, except to believe that it all happened for a reason. You learn from the situation, which can make you a better person everyday.

When the worst it's over, I know that things will go back to normal. Although it would not be as perfect as it was before.