he's so close, yet so far...
he's nice...
he's awesome...
he has his own elements spinned through the beats of satisfaction...
he's not mine...
cause he's taken
(unknown)
sadis..huehuhe..
Tuesday, March 15, 2005
Tuesday, March 08, 2005
The story of my life
Gosh..it's been a while since I wrote a real post here. Although I have so much to do right now, I feel like sharing something. That will be the story of my life :) Though, I wrote about some of these events sometimes ago, I just had to share them again.
I was born on July 27, 1981. Growing up in a small family with my mom, dad, and my sister, I have always been the quiet one, but none of my friends will believe me if I tell them I'm quiet and shy! I went to a preschool called tk Kembang and it turned out that I had several friends that I met throughout my life who went to that preschool too. Even my brother in-law went to that preschool with my sister before they even knew each other and fell in love.
I can say that I grew up in a devoted Moslem family. I went to an Islamic school since I was probably five-years-old. I met my very first friend when I was in the 1st grade. She was my deskmate and playmate. We went everywhere together and even moved out from one school to another together.
When I was in junior high, I met my first boyfriend. He was a year younger. Since then, my friends often joke around with me always attracted to little kid! It was weird, but hey..that's what happened. We went out for about nine months and that was it. I had a crush once with my bestfriend's ex-boyfriend, who was also my bestfriend. Confusing? Yes. Did she know? Yes. What happened? Nothing..and we're still bestfriend..it's just only a crush anyway.
I was a crazy kid in junior high who loved to make prank calls to the high school seniors and spy on them everywhere. I loved to just being silly.
When I graduated from junior high, I decided to try something new. I went to this great catholic school with only girls. One of my reasons was because of my boredom with my school uniforms which was always the same since I was in the elementary school! In my high school, I got to wear colorful short skirts and short sleeve shirts instead of a long..I mean long..boring skirts and long sleeve shirts. Hey..I lived in Jakarta where it's hot like crazy!
My first week in high school was a nightmare! My seniors were so damn scary. I got yelled and it was so freakin' annoying. Thank God my cousin was one of the seniors, so I got a little better treatment than the others :P I met a couple of my elementary school friends in high school, which was exiting. One of them become my close bestfriends. Being in a school with only girls had made us gone crazy here and there sometimes.
I met my second boyfriend when I was in my first year of highschool. Of course we were not in the same school! And the funny thing was, he was one of my bestfriends' ex who turned out to be a fake. What a real jerk! February 18, that was our anniversary. Eewh! Although I thought he's very cute. We went out for about two or three months and everything's a mess. We had a fight once because of a silly thing. I told him that Gwen Steffani was once a guy and she's now a transgender. We had a stupid fight because of that and never talked to each other ever since. It took me a year or two to forget about him. Crazy!
During my high school was when the Internet was booming. E-mails, online chat, etc. I got involved in what was called online love. Gross! I had a crush on one of them once. He was not even my type because he had this really weird but yet funkiest style ever. Then, I met someone who became my best buddy ever but we've never even met. Everything became so confusing, we were on and off, until I got yelled by his ex girlfriend on the Internet. What a weirdo.
I had a great sweet 17th birthday party during my second year in high school. Although I didn't know about 30 percent of the people who came to the party, I still enjoyed it. It was fun.
In my last year of high school, I got a chance to act like a senior. Yelling at our juniors for no reasons and acting crazy were my favorite times in high school. Especially after yelling to one of my juniors who turned out to be my ex-boyfriend's "I don't know what to call it."
My prom was okay. Didn't have a date but we all girls went together and booked a room at the hotel. Throughout the history, our school had always had the prom with another high school which was also a homogeneous school, with only guys.
Overall, my high school years were alright.
I graduated from high school and met this guy. Went out for two or three months and I broke it off. Why? We just had a different principle and I realized that we couldn't go anywhere because of that.
I did not get into any state universities, which was kinda sad. I was thinking on studying abroad. The options were either Singapore, Malaysia, and the U.S. But then, my mom found this community college that allowed its students to transfer to the U.S.
There I was..studying at IEP (Int'l Education Programs). My college years were great. I met great people who become my bestfriends. Again, I had a crush on one of them for more than a year. To me..he's perfect. Well, okay..almost. We're very close and had the same interest. He was..unpredictable. Yes..that's a perfect word for him. On and off that's how he was. "I need time to explore everything," that's what he pretty much said. Blah! He made me really stressed out that I just lost myself and cried to a couple of my friends on the rooftop of the building. That became a joke throughout the years. Oh well. Then he went out with another girl and didn't tell me about it. Whatever.
During my college year in Jakarta I got involved in this group of friends who planned to organize a "Battle of the bands" show. I met really cool people and become good friends with them. Meetings after meetings, we decided to not do it because it just hard to do it at that time. Though it was over, we all still hang out a lot and I ended up creating an event organizer with a couple of those people. Redlight productions. Lol!
It went great and I found my interest in event planning because of it. Without being over confident, I can say that I am good at it, although I still have a lot to learn. We organized a couple parties and had really fun times. We hung out almost every week, went to new cool bars and clubs in town on Fridays and went to movies or eat out on Saturdays. I missed the old times.
Also, during my college year, I met my friend from junior high, whom I had a crush on once, through my friend. It was so funny. We went out a couple of times and I didn't feel anything. So, I decided to stop and I regretted it.
Then, I graduated from my college and got an associate degree. I applied to several schools in the U.S. to continue my study and ended up in this good ol' Colorado. It was kinda sad leaving my friends and my life in Jakarta. It's going to be different, I knew it.
A couple of my friends from my community college also went to the U.S. to continue their study. One of them was in New York and another one went to Philly.
I got into the Business school in Colorado State University majoring in computer information system, which I hated the most, and marketing, which I enjoyed the most.
Around two or three months after I arrived, I started this relationship with this guy and it went on for almost three years. He's a great guy and everything, but we had problems here and there and we just didn't see us in the future. I believe that everything happened for a reason, so I just had to let it go. He just moved back home for good a couple of months ago.
I started working part time at this dining hall at the university. It was great! Earned my own money and everything.
My sister got married five months after I arrived here. I couldn't go home because I had so many tests and it was impossible to come home at that time.
My sister and her husband moved to D.C. for about three months. It was great, because I had the chance to visit them.
In my third semester, I became the president of the Indonesian Students Association and with my interest in event planning, I organized this huge..huge event called "Indonesian Night" where we had around 400 attendances. It was awesome and it felt great.
I graduated in 2003 and decided to go to grad school, majoring in technical journalism and communication. Journalism? That is not me. But then I found out that it's not all about journalism. We learned about the idea of communication, public relations, and so on. Hey..it turned out that this is something I want to learn.
I applied to this organization at CSU to work as a parapro. My job is to help with multicultural programs. I really love my job. I'm also still working in dining services.
I went back home last christmas break. Everything was so different. All my friends have already had great jobs. A couple of them are married and one of them has a baby. Wow, where have I been?
Now, here I am in my last year of grad school. Hopefully! I don't have any classes this semester and all I have to do is write my thesis.
I thought this semester would be a relaxing semester. I am planning to finish my novel but it's not happening because I'm too busy with a lot of other things. It's hard to manage my time with two jobs, writing a thesis, organizing a tsunami fund raising, and writing a novel. Sometimes I feel like I don't have time to socialize anymore. And that's scary. But I'll live.
I got a call from my mom last night and we were talking about school and family stuff. Suddenly my mom told me that I'm a bit picky on finding a "boyfriend." Wow. Hmm..I don't think so. Well, maybe I am, but I have my own reasons though. And seriously, I still have an unfinished business here. No details.
I thought she knows me well, but I guess she's not. Well, it's probably because I don't feel like talking about that kind of stuff with my family, because it feels weird. So, it's probably my fault anyway. It made me sad sometimes when I think about it, but hey, what can you do?
I want to go back home so badly...!!! I want to finish school and find a decent 8 to 5 job.
I chatted with a couple of my friends last night and I missed them so much!
Anyways, here I am, sitting in front of the computer, writing the longest post ever. I was walking to the library earlier but I decided to go back because the weather was not good and I had left my file at home. But now, the sun is coming out and it looks really nice. Oh well.
My upcoming exciting things:
-Spring break
-Alicia Keys concert
-Maroon5 concert
-U2 concert
My not so exciting thing(s):
-I'm broke
Oh..by the way..I'm in love with an old friend. LOL!
"Tell me when will you be mine
Tell me quando quando quando
We can share a love devine
Please don't make me wait again
When will you say yes to me
Tell me quando quando quando
You mean happiness to me
Oh my lover tell me when"
(Michael Bublé - Quando, Quando, Quando)
I was born on July 27, 1981. Growing up in a small family with my mom, dad, and my sister, I have always been the quiet one, but none of my friends will believe me if I tell them I'm quiet and shy! I went to a preschool called tk Kembang and it turned out that I had several friends that I met throughout my life who went to that preschool too. Even my brother in-law went to that preschool with my sister before they even knew each other and fell in love.
I can say that I grew up in a devoted Moslem family. I went to an Islamic school since I was probably five-years-old. I met my very first friend when I was in the 1st grade. She was my deskmate and playmate. We went everywhere together and even moved out from one school to another together.
When I was in junior high, I met my first boyfriend. He was a year younger. Since then, my friends often joke around with me always attracted to little kid! It was weird, but hey..that's what happened. We went out for about nine months and that was it. I had a crush once with my bestfriend's ex-boyfriend, who was also my bestfriend. Confusing? Yes. Did she know? Yes. What happened? Nothing..and we're still bestfriend..it's just only a crush anyway.
I was a crazy kid in junior high who loved to make prank calls to the high school seniors and spy on them everywhere. I loved to just being silly.
When I graduated from junior high, I decided to try something new. I went to this great catholic school with only girls. One of my reasons was because of my boredom with my school uniforms which was always the same since I was in the elementary school! In my high school, I got to wear colorful short skirts and short sleeve shirts instead of a long..I mean long..boring skirts and long sleeve shirts. Hey..I lived in Jakarta where it's hot like crazy!
My first week in high school was a nightmare! My seniors were so damn scary. I got yelled and it was so freakin' annoying. Thank God my cousin was one of the seniors, so I got a little better treatment than the others :P I met a couple of my elementary school friends in high school, which was exiting. One of them become my close bestfriends. Being in a school with only girls had made us gone crazy here and there sometimes.
I met my second boyfriend when I was in my first year of highschool. Of course we were not in the same school! And the funny thing was, he was one of my bestfriends' ex who turned out to be a fake. What a real jerk! February 18, that was our anniversary. Eewh! Although I thought he's very cute. We went out for about two or three months and everything's a mess. We had a fight once because of a silly thing. I told him that Gwen Steffani was once a guy and she's now a transgender. We had a stupid fight because of that and never talked to each other ever since. It took me a year or two to forget about him. Crazy!
During my high school was when the Internet was booming. E-mails, online chat, etc. I got involved in what was called online love. Gross! I had a crush on one of them once. He was not even my type because he had this really weird but yet funkiest style ever. Then, I met someone who became my best buddy ever but we've never even met. Everything became so confusing, we were on and off, until I got yelled by his ex girlfriend on the Internet. What a weirdo.
I had a great sweet 17th birthday party during my second year in high school. Although I didn't know about 30 percent of the people who came to the party, I still enjoyed it. It was fun.
In my last year of high school, I got a chance to act like a senior. Yelling at our juniors for no reasons and acting crazy were my favorite times in high school. Especially after yelling to one of my juniors who turned out to be my ex-boyfriend's "I don't know what to call it."
My prom was okay. Didn't have a date but we all girls went together and booked a room at the hotel. Throughout the history, our school had always had the prom with another high school which was also a homogeneous school, with only guys.
Overall, my high school years were alright.
I graduated from high school and met this guy. Went out for two or three months and I broke it off. Why? We just had a different principle and I realized that we couldn't go anywhere because of that.
I did not get into any state universities, which was kinda sad. I was thinking on studying abroad. The options were either Singapore, Malaysia, and the U.S. But then, my mom found this community college that allowed its students to transfer to the U.S.
There I was..studying at IEP (Int'l Education Programs). My college years were great. I met great people who become my bestfriends. Again, I had a crush on one of them for more than a year. To me..he's perfect. Well, okay..almost. We're very close and had the same interest. He was..unpredictable. Yes..that's a perfect word for him. On and off that's how he was. "I need time to explore everything," that's what he pretty much said. Blah! He made me really stressed out that I just lost myself and cried to a couple of my friends on the rooftop of the building. That became a joke throughout the years. Oh well. Then he went out with another girl and didn't tell me about it. Whatever.
During my college year in Jakarta I got involved in this group of friends who planned to organize a "Battle of the bands" show. I met really cool people and become good friends with them. Meetings after meetings, we decided to not do it because it just hard to do it at that time. Though it was over, we all still hang out a lot and I ended up creating an event organizer with a couple of those people. Redlight productions. Lol!
It went great and I found my interest in event planning because of it. Without being over confident, I can say that I am good at it, although I still have a lot to learn. We organized a couple parties and had really fun times. We hung out almost every week, went to new cool bars and clubs in town on Fridays and went to movies or eat out on Saturdays. I missed the old times.
Also, during my college year, I met my friend from junior high, whom I had a crush on once, through my friend. It was so funny. We went out a couple of times and I didn't feel anything. So, I decided to stop and I regretted it.
Then, I graduated from my college and got an associate degree. I applied to several schools in the U.S. to continue my study and ended up in this good ol' Colorado. It was kinda sad leaving my friends and my life in Jakarta. It's going to be different, I knew it.
A couple of my friends from my community college also went to the U.S. to continue their study. One of them was in New York and another one went to Philly.
I got into the Business school in Colorado State University majoring in computer information system, which I hated the most, and marketing, which I enjoyed the most.
Around two or three months after I arrived, I started this relationship with this guy and it went on for almost three years. He's a great guy and everything, but we had problems here and there and we just didn't see us in the future. I believe that everything happened for a reason, so I just had to let it go. He just moved back home for good a couple of months ago.
I started working part time at this dining hall at the university. It was great! Earned my own money and everything.
My sister got married five months after I arrived here. I couldn't go home because I had so many tests and it was impossible to come home at that time.
My sister and her husband moved to D.C. for about three months. It was great, because I had the chance to visit them.
In my third semester, I became the president of the Indonesian Students Association and with my interest in event planning, I organized this huge..huge event called "Indonesian Night" where we had around 400 attendances. It was awesome and it felt great.
I graduated in 2003 and decided to go to grad school, majoring in technical journalism and communication. Journalism? That is not me. But then I found out that it's not all about journalism. We learned about the idea of communication, public relations, and so on. Hey..it turned out that this is something I want to learn.
I applied to this organization at CSU to work as a parapro. My job is to help with multicultural programs. I really love my job. I'm also still working in dining services.
I went back home last christmas break. Everything was so different. All my friends have already had great jobs. A couple of them are married and one of them has a baby. Wow, where have I been?
Now, here I am in my last year of grad school. Hopefully! I don't have any classes this semester and all I have to do is write my thesis.
I thought this semester would be a relaxing semester. I am planning to finish my novel but it's not happening because I'm too busy with a lot of other things. It's hard to manage my time with two jobs, writing a thesis, organizing a tsunami fund raising, and writing a novel. Sometimes I feel like I don't have time to socialize anymore. And that's scary. But I'll live.
I got a call from my mom last night and we were talking about school and family stuff. Suddenly my mom told me that I'm a bit picky on finding a "boyfriend." Wow. Hmm..I don't think so. Well, maybe I am, but I have my own reasons though. And seriously, I still have an unfinished business here. No details.
I thought she knows me well, but I guess she's not. Well, it's probably because I don't feel like talking about that kind of stuff with my family, because it feels weird. So, it's probably my fault anyway. It made me sad sometimes when I think about it, but hey, what can you do?
I want to go back home so badly...!!! I want to finish school and find a decent 8 to 5 job.
I chatted with a couple of my friends last night and I missed them so much!
Anyways, here I am, sitting in front of the computer, writing the longest post ever. I was walking to the library earlier but I decided to go back because the weather was not good and I had left my file at home. But now, the sun is coming out and it looks really nice. Oh well.
My upcoming exciting things:
-Spring break
-Alicia Keys concert
-Maroon5 concert
-U2 concert
My not so exciting thing(s):
-I'm broke
Oh..by the way..I'm in love with an old friend. LOL!
"Tell me when will you be mine
Tell me quando quando quando
We can share a love devine
Please don't make me wait again
When will you say yes to me
Tell me quando quando quando
You mean happiness to me
Oh my lover tell me when"
(Michael Bublé - Quando, Quando, Quando)
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